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Saturday, December 24, 2011

Merry Christmas to all!

Our Christmas is different this year... we are 6 hours away from home, in Portland, Oregon, spending our time running between both our older girls apartments. It is okay, tho, we are together. The emotions I am feeling about their lives, the pride in how they are making it work, the worries that come with being a parent and wanting to "fix things" for them", and the love I feel for them is overwhelming. I miss the Christmas eve's when we would read "The Night Before Christmas" and then tuck their little, sweet, clean bodies into bed in new pajamas, so they could dream of Santa flying through the air. I hate change, and have fought it all my life (as a child of an alcoholic and being a recovering alcoholic, it's part of my defense-change is scary.)

But, they are growing up, and I have realized that I embedded my fear of change in them. Now, as we get ready to sleep on the floor of an apartment in a busy city instead of our familiar bed surrounded by our lil' farm, I realize it's not how, when, or where you spend the holidays, it's that you adjust and go with the flow. My daughters know, I hope, that I love them all so much, and that no matter what, whether we are together in a familiar setting, together in a different setting, or apart, we are always together!

Merry Christmas... keep Christmas in your heart and soul everyday!


  1. Merry Christmas, Ruth! Have a wonderful holiday.

  2. thanks for sharing all that ,some is the same for me,although I just call my self a worry wort ,I do hate change ,hate it with a passion.and as I see everyone struggling around me ,I CAN ONLY HOPE THING WILL LOOK UP

  3. A lovely post spoken from your heart as only a mother can. Whether we have one child or eight, we never stop loving or being concerned about them. You said it all when you said that mothers just want to make it "all better." We can't; all we can do is be there with our love and support. That will never change.

    Enjoy your time with your beautiful daughters. I have a feeling it means a lot to them to have you near right now.

    Merry Christmas to you all!

  4. What an inspiring post. As parents we only care about one thing...that our kids are okay. Getting to have them with us or near us is a much coveted bonus. Blessings, marlene